#Wyll would not romance Astarion guys come on

[errantgoat]

Camelia is past the halfway point of act 3, I might be done this week if I find the time to indulge for an hour or two every day...since I'm not doing every side-quest, and definitely not House of Hope this time around.

Also why the eff I believed the rumors Wyll's questline got cut?! SLANDER. I haven't done it yet... (his and Astarion's are left for me to finish) but it triggered normally. Maybe some dialogue during the quest itself got cut? We shall see.

After that...Astarion's origin playthrough. THE FINAL ONE GODS. I'm so excited for it, you have no idea, but it will take an iron will on my part to not goodie-two shoes him and not reach for those optimal outcomes. He is so very selfish. I mean one can choose to act 'decently' while having ulterior motives but this asshole might be too bloodthirsty and smoothbrained for it. :P

[wildfairies]

i don't understand the urge to write hate think pieces about video game characters/their writing on here like at all

[beeribas]

Hot take: we don't need another sad white boy in media. I swear to the gods if I see one more sad white guy whose abuser is a BIPOC/BIPOC coded man I'm gonna commit arson. Most aren't bad story wise, but the trope is horrible for so many reasons and I am so tired of seeing it.

[tsaritza-mika]

Sorry not Sorry guys...

I respect all your inter-companion romance ships, and I hope they bring you joy and endless inspiration, but I have a primal need for something different. I don't need my companions dating each other.

I need them to be the most dysfunctional yet supportive found family they can be

I need Karlach to be literal 'Mama K' and grab Shadowheart and Lae'zel by the scruff and put them on coat hangers, telling them that if they can't say anything nice, then shut the fuck up for five minutes and if they can do that, then she'll come and let them down

I need Astarion and Gale to get into such a spat that all dignity and posh goes out the fucking window, and they devolve into two grown-ass men having a 13-year-old style slap fight while calling each other the harshest of obscenities, but if anyone from the outside tries calling either of them less than fabulous, they join forces and fuck them up

I need Wyll, Shadowheart, and Lae'zel to do each other's hair while discussing all the ways they've taken down various opponents and monsters, and how they would have done things better

I need Jaheira just smacking everyone upside the head whenever they say or do something stupid. Because gods dammit why is she always the only one who can see trouble from a hundred miles away, only to have her perception check fail and stumble right into a trap Halsin had set up to catch food for dinner

I need Astarion to embroider offensive cross stitch into every other companion's tents when he's left behind at camp, for no other reason than he's feeling salty that day

I need Halsin to wildshape into a bear just so he can surprise Karlach with an actual bear and Clive having a tea party with flower crowns and drawings of the horrible ways Gortash will be killed

I need Shadowheart being a petty bitch and letting anyone who was being especially stupid in a fight get a little too close to death as punishment before finally healing them. Because that's just what healers do

I need Gale pranking people with his spells. Use mage hand to yank the rug out from under Lae'zel after she insisted that he was too squishy to fight properly. Casting 'create water' over Shadowheart to ruin her makeup in retaliation for saying last night's stew was a bit bland. Use Telekinesis to fling Astarion off in some random direction because dammit Gale just woke up, and the man needs his coffee before he can properly deal with all of that first thing in the damn morning

I need Lae'zel to take pillow fights just a little too seriously

I need Wyll begging Halsin and Jaheira if they can wildshape into a bear and a shark just so he can ride both of them through the Chionthar while recklessly casting Fireball and Lightning Bolt at the sky, because just think of how cool he would look doing it

[writteninlunarlight-years]

Can I request headcanons for Astarion, Gale, and Halsin being jealous of some guy is flirting with their female s/o although she's oblivious that he's flirting with her? He's so possessive that he even took her back home to have a heated make-out while holding her close!

Astarion

ThE pLaN wAs SiMpLe. All jokes about Astarions' cut scene aside, he simply tried not to like you.

He tried not to notice your smile, laugh, or radiant personality that felt like the sun.

He fell, though, and you were everything to him, but he was afraid to lose you. To push you too far, you to abandon him like all others.

He tried oh so hard not to think about how that tieflings stupid tail was getting dangerously close to you.

You were so naive and unique, so headstrong but so so clueless. How could you spot an ambush a yard away but couldn't tell this creature was hitting on you.

Astarion chose the safe route of just sitting there and watching like always.

A burning fire lit within him, the usual cold tempered vampire became lit with something. Jealousy? No, it couldn't be.

Then that damn tail wrapped around your leg; why, just why couldn't you be simple? Why couldn't he just not care who you sleep with?

Before he knew it, he stood before you, the tiefling behind him. Why?

He turned on his charm, and before he knew it, he was wooing the Tiefling, convincing him to go on his married way in hopes of bedding another.

Astarion looked at you as the tiefling left, and the fear of losing something so good ate at him. Gripping your arm, he took off as quickly as a fox through the forest you close behind.

Once safely away from prying eyes where he could be vulnerable, show you how much he cared and how scared he was of losing you, and he kissed you deeply.

You two had bedded in the forest many times before, but today, your connection was so passionately different.

Gale

Gale liked to imagine he was a simple man who didn't need much, especially after all that happened with Mystra.

That was until you came along, with your well everything; Gale couldn't find anything to hate about you.

The fear of messing up again and entering a new world of troubles ate him alive—almost as bad as the orb resting in his heart.

That's why anyone getting close to you, even a fraction of romance hinted or thrown your way, killed him.

He knew his place, though. Trying to woo a woman got him into the mess he is in now, so he just stood by and watched as people flirted with you.

Every instance though filled him up like a bottle, soon the pressure was going to explode but he didn't know how to inform you of this.

That night at Sharess Caress, though, when the twins propositioned you, the bottle overflowed.

Gale couldn't handle the pressure building or how you just laughed at the twins even though he could tell you were uncomfortable by their touch.

Before he knew it, he pulled you into him and used his ability to travel the astral plane to escape.

You were his and his alone to look at, adore, and love. No outside force or group could take you. Here, he ravaged you all night and early in the morning.

From that day on, Gale never hesitated to steal you away to his private hiding place to show you his more jealous side.

Halsin

Halsin was one with nature, so sharing with you wasn't horrible.

He knew that people would come and go, but he would be your one rock, always present and always there.

That made this evening at camp so much more confusing for him.

Halsin knew the wizard, vampire, and legend were all seeking your companionship, especially since they all brought it up to him before this month.

However, watching them flirt with you repeatedly, you just accepting the advances and taunts ate at him a little.

Halsin tried to go on nature walks, work with the land, and even speak to the great oak father about this; however, he turned up blank.

Tonight at camp was exceptionally hard. Though you had turned down Wyll and Gale, you never quite turned down Astarion. Halsin didn't know why this tore him up.

As the vampire asked you to take your life force once again, Halsin grew irate. You were simply too oblivious to realize this was an addictive habit, so you always stayed by the cold man's side.

Anger consumed him, and Halsin went to your side. Grabbing your hand and dragging you along, Halsin allowed nature to take its course.

Once you two stopped in the middle of a clearing, Halsin sighed. "Oak father's blessing, I know I always said nature can take its course, but Petal, I do not think I can stand this any longer. Let's just stay us, me, you, and no one else."

Once his profession came to light and you agreed, no questions asked, Halsin couldn't wait to enjoy the combination of you two as one. Oak Father's blessing on you both.

[iicaru2]

we all agree on the comedic value of astarion being a horrid little terror of a son-in-law to ulder ravengard, but id like to introduce you to another point: the dark urge (inspired by my 2nd durge run where im romancing wyll)

post-iron throne debacle, ulder is still reeling from the revelations that he is a Bad Father and wyll is the sweetest most forgiving man on the continent, and his son cheerfully decides to introduce him to his love, the person he plans to spend the rest of his life with— and ulder is trying, so he prepares himself to play nice with the cheeky little vampire spawn that practically hangs off his son and flirts with him every chance he gets, or perhaps the very sweet, very strong tiefling that almost dislocated his arm giving him a handshake.

instead, he comes face to face with the guy that stormed past him earlier muttering about blood and intestines, glaring at him with murderous intent that outpaces their soon-to-be dead sister, somehow covered in blood first thing in the morning. the same guy who threatened to put him back in the ocean if he didnt quit insulting wylls entire being the other night. the entire time his son is gently holding hands with the wretched bhaalspawn who only agreed to save ulders life because, if they didnt, wyll would be sad.

and wyll, aforementioned sweetest man on the continent, keeps smiling and saying things like “arent they wonderful, this is the person that helped free me from mizora and save you, i dont believe ive ever met anyone to be so kind to me,” while the dark urge silently murder-glares at ulder all the while, promising death should he ever hurt his wonderful son again. ulder has to watch these two adorably dance and declare sweet things to each other as if durge wasnt just imagining ulder as a splat of gore on the stones underfoot seconds prior.

and then he has to watch them get married, with all their slightly mad friends in tow. it is a glorious disaster.

[not-so-lost-after-all]

What do you think of Dadstarion? I don't know, but it's surprising how constantly hated and controversial it is for the Astarion and BG3 fandom. Many Astarion fans still act as if it's the ultimate affront to his character or a breeding/pregnancy kink some horny fans are projecting onto him because he must really hate children as he approves of being mean to them like telling Yenna to fuck off (as if he doesn't also approve of giving her food or other instances like saving Vanra) or because it's something that will infringe on his freedom forevermore. Or that you are sending an awful message for doing this to him because he's queer and you'd be forcing a queer man into a heteronormative dynamic. Also, the projection thing can be argued in both instances? Most of those who hate this headcanon are childfree themselves irl so you could also accuse them of projecting their own lifestyle preferences and belief onto Astarion.

Meanwhile others just come up with chronically online takes that it's a character trait that is stolen from Wyll as he's the only one who expresses the desire to have a family so you may also be a racist for not romancing him instead. I see Gale fans who like him as a dad are also now being accused of the same thing. Saying Astarion can be romantic to his partner will also result in you getting accused of stealing character traits from Wyll, by the way.

Like, dhampirs are very very rare and I don't see the topic coming up between Tav and Astarion but if it accidentally happens…I also don't think Astarion would just abandon Tav and their kid and would try to be a good dad. Or maybe I'm the delusional one. Ultimately though it's a harmless headcanon and it's not like it's something anyone truly believes is going to happen canonically in a future game. If anything we'll have some horny, single Astarion that's similar to act 1 or AA as canon.

Hello, Nonnie, and thank you for this interesting ask. I'm mostly staying out of the fandom drama, so while I knew about the "stealing from Wyll" takes and saw a few myself, that take about heteronormativity is new to me. Of course both is BS. Wyll is a family man, yes, but you can say the same about Halsin and Gale certainly sounds like someone who'd like to have a child in the future, whether bio or adopted, and Karlach would most likely give it a shot once her problem is solved. And try to tell any reasonable queer person that they shouldn't have kids because it's a straight thing to do and they should just support the gays instead. Just try it, guys, I'm waiting.

As for him hating kids, it annoys me too whenever I see such takes. It's surface level reading and seeing only what they want to see (as you've mentioned, he approves helping children too). He finds traumatazing Mayrina funny but that's not about her being pregnant. When he finds out that the Gur kids are undead, he's nonchalant about it but that's in character for him to wear a mask and some people wrongly take what he says at face value again. He'd prefer not to seet his shame of his again but that doesn't mean he doesn't care.

And lastly about dadstarion. I'm childfree and wouldn't be a kind mother but I like the idea of Astarion as a father. I don't generally like the concept of the undead having children but I like that for him as a fuck you to Cazador and everything he took from Star. Not as a breeding kink projected onto him, no. Would he be a good father? Well, he'd be anxious and loving, I believe. He'd think him abandoning Tav and the kid would be for the best but would never actually do that. Of course there'll never be a little silver haired dhampir in the canon it's a fringe lore and Stephen Rooney wasn't even aware it's an option in DnD.

[thedomesticanthropologist]

Interesting takes I've seen so far in the "Makes me feel safe" votes

1) people saying Astarion or Laezel would make them feel safe- I have to assume you mean Act 3 versions of them that are healed and have a close bond with you??? Idk man Act 1 and even 2 versions don't offer much physical or emotional safety 😂 ya'll

2) Haslin comes off as a predator to some of you?? A creep? This startled me. Then I realized his writing was lacking and they shoe-horned in the romance so if you ask him casual questions, like just friendly "any lovers in your life?" It triggers as flirting and then he acts like you guys have been making moon eyes at each other and is surprised if you reject him. He's also Polyamorous and some people see him asking when you're in a relationship already as being gross. It's interesting because my interpretation of Halsin is WAY DIFFERENT but I can also see how some people got there

3) Karlach is a safety net for most people the only thing that de-railed her from winning was two things: her heat issue/engine causing lack of physical safety and then interestingly her Rage. She gets loud when she's mad and hits objects and this can trigger some people. Neat take! Never noticed that

3) Wyll not sweeping the poles surprised me a lot but people seem concerned that he'd take them put on an adventure and get everyone killed monster hunting and that cracked me up a bit

None of these are my opinions I just trolled the tags and comments and saw these angles presented

[lesbianralzarek]

i have a lot of gripes with the way mizora's sex scene (and honestly the relationship she has with wyll in general (thanks, christmas animation)) is handled, but its not necessarily a terrible addition to an rpg where you can do some bad shit (iirc you cant fuck mizora if you assaulted the grove tho, so mostly good pcs even get this option). what is terrible is the lack of gravity given to it, and the fact that you can only betray wyll in this way. if you could also fuck gortash or shar, and doing so had tangible consequences no matter what, id be much happier with it. as it stands, a player who is in good standing with wyll (or doesnt play with him anyway) and is romancing astarion, shadowheart, or even fucking karlach (why is this not a dealbreaker for her???) gets away with it. why is fucking the woman who owns an origin character's soul and calls him her pet and turned him into a devil and has condemned him to eternal torment not a big deal?

it would also sting less if (and i say this as a lesbian) wyll had a sex scene. wyll is the only romanceable character with no sex scene, and his abuser gets a long-ass full frontal cutscene. come on. do larians writers understand that abuse against men is always bad, or is it okay when the abuser is a sexy white (coded) woman? wylls selflessness to the extent of self-harm is a core part of his character, but its fucked up that everyone gets away with hurting him. he only leaves if you attack other people (the grove), but you can do whatever you want to him personally. you cant hurt mizora, even though shes hanging out in. your. camp. because who gives a shit? hurting a black guy is a victimless crime in this game

[marvelhead17]

Baldur's Gate 3 Dribble

Do any of my mutuals play? This game is absolutely addictive, especially when trying to get certain outcomes. If Marvel had come out with anything similar I would have sold my soul for it probably.

In the last week and a half I've played another 70+ hours so I have 389+ hours and do you know how many playthroughs I've completed? Just the one. Only have 36/54 achievements. Some people have played 1500 hours and said they've discovered new things along the way (whether exaggerating or because they've played since it's earlier phases, it's constantly getting patch updates and new content).

I've got another campaign going that is nearly there, but I've been into character creation again and UGH it's just so fun to do the stuff for the Emerald Grove in Act 1.

But also, there so many companions whether you romance them or not, just to do their quests sometimes. And then you can still get good and bad endings for EACH?

Lae'zel, Shadowheart, Astarion, Gale, Wyll (these first ones are the main ones that you can even play yourself and get g/b endings for), and then Halsin, Jaheira, and Minsc can join you later. I don't know if the last 2 on the list are romanceable, but there are still bad characters you can have that I haven't explored yet.

Gushing about my Tavs below, and possibly spoilers for anyone who hasn't gone beyond Act 1 if you are playing, so just be aware.

In my first playthrough it was Karlach that I romanced, gods what a beautiful Devil. My character is a wood half-elf barbarian named Narriel. And she joined Karlach in Avernus when she had to return, so they look so badass in leather and everything!

Second playthrough, the beefcake and 'my heart' Halsin (no I did not do him in bear form, as tempting as it was, maybe on another run). I stuck with Narriel, (it's my fave name for a fantasy character okay?) as a wood half-elf cleric. This campaign is nearly there and I hate to see it go.

Third playthrough (I tried Astarian with another Tav but lord is that man difficult to please unless you are playing a bad guy) is with Gale. They are a non-binary wizard wood half-elf named Phoenix and they are stunning. I've just arrived in Baldur's Gate and so the final quests begin.

Fourth, I've started a Durge (Dark Urge) Playthrough, a White Dragonborn named Minerva, and it's going good so far for her (I'm not accepting The Urge, because I'm a simp for these characters and they don't like you doing bad shit). I've only completed the Grove so there is much more to go. I'm not quite sure who to romance yet, but I like that idea of Halsin saving her.

Possibly restarting Morgan's story (again, which sucks cause I played nearly 70 hours, realised Astarion was never gonna make a move based on a missing cutscene in Act 1, and now dedicated another 8 hours just to be frustrated) to go for Shadowheart instead, as being a tiefling makes it impossibly difficult for Act 1 to please Astarian without going against your own race, like damn. But also she's not that dark and Shadowheart is so easy to please, in most of my playthroughs she's tried to come on to me in the beginning, so I see how she was the most romanced.

Made a bard named Callon, he is (surprise) a wood half-elf who is starting off with the Lute. Going for Wyll the Blade of Frontiers because I watched Neil Newbon (Astarian's actor) play BG3 and invited the actor to speak about him, and it made me want to try! It's been adorable so far and I'm barely in it yet.

Made a character for fun named Nixie (based off of the All for One DnD YouTube series by Deerstalker Pictures), who is a pink tiefling sorcerer that loves casting firespells and is mischievous. We'll see where she takes us, but without that in mind I've decided to ignore her playthrough so far haha.

That leaves us with Lae'zel who I haven't decided a character for just yet, and Astarion who I need to reconsider for. As well as Minthara? I'm not sure what other companions can be romanced that aren't in the initial party, all I know is Minthara is easy for a Durge playthrough. I also think there was a possibility with Mizora? I don't know.

Send help.

[fandomcringebucket]

What If Baldur’s Gate 3 Characters Were Magnus Archive Fear Avatars?

This has been sitting in a Google doc since last year, I'm not hyperfixating on either of these fandoms currently but you guys get to see it finally because I'm sick of seeing it unfinished in my drafts.

Without further ado, this is what I think all the BG3 companions (minus Minsc and Jaheira) + the Dead Three's chosen would be the avatars of if they were TMA fear avatars! Plus explanation, of course.

[Blanket Spoiler Warning, Proceed With Caution]

Lae’zel: The Slaughter, since Gith culture is militaristic and Lae’zel is a soldier through and through— she doesn't mindlessly kill or easily fly into a blind rage, but she still craves blood all the same.

Shadowheart: The Dark. Come on, Shar wants to plunge the world into eternal darkness, this writes itself.

Astarion: The Web, for his fixation on manipulation and gaining power in any way he can. Hell, even in his romance he was manipulating Tav/Durge at first, even if he realizes that security wasn't all he wanted.

Gale: The Eye, his obsession with knowledge and his need to know more was what brought him ruin and led him to the Orb, not unlike a certain Archivist we know.

Wyll: The Hunt, since he's literally primarily a hunter of monsters and other demonic creatures. Targeted by the Eye, maybe, since Mizora uses his bloodstone eye for surveillance and he's so worried about pursuing a romance with Tav/Durge because she's turned his own brain into a nightmare panopticon where he doesn't know if he's being watched so he always acts like he is.

Karlach: The Slaughter, for her connections with war and destruction— she's full of rage and violence but while I do think the fire caused by her engine smacks of Desolation, she's not been brought low enough to be a Desolation avatar in my opinion (even with her consuming other people's misery like one via Soul Coins).

Halsin: The Hunt, mostly for his animal connections and his obsession with tracking down the answers to fix the Shadow Curse not unlike the way you see mentions of explorers in the 1800s trying to find secrets in the more remote parts of the world.

Minthara: The Web, not just because drow and haha spiders but because she's fixated on gaining power, even if you recruited her the “good” way. Hell, you literally find her sitting on Ketheric’s throne after you kill him in the Mindflayer colony and come back up to the surface of Moonrise.

Withers: Not even an avatar, he's just The End, as the Literal (Retired) God Of Death And Everything Surrounding It.

Ketheric: The End, which is fitting not only because Myrkul is the Necromancer in the Dead Three trio, but because Ketheric's motivation for turning to evil gods (first Shar, then Myrkul) was because his wife and daughter died, and he couldn't handle that loss.

Orin: The Slaughter, for obvious reasons. Not the Hunt, mostly just because Bhaal focuses on the blood of the murder itself, not the chase beforehand. But I do think she's sharing winks with the Stranger, what with her being a Changeling and all.

Gortash: The Web, as The Web’s avatars tend to love manipulation and holding power over others— fitting for the Chosen of the God of Tyranny. (Touched by Desolation like Mike Crew was touched by the Spiral because of Gortash’s connection to the Hells, maybe?)

[angel-bitch-boy]

Astarion Romances

BloodWeave and BloodFrontier.

Do I like Bloodweave? Yes, I like the fact Astarions story directly foils Gales. I like that they are both under the thumb of someone more powerful than them and their inital conculsion (if good ol tav wasn't there) would be to take more power to protect themselves. THe fact that Astarion so deeply hates Cazador opposed to Gale's blind devotion to Mystria.

BUT

Realistically? I think Wyll is the best choice for Astarion. Astarion has said when he was younger he'd always imagined he'd end up with "the heroic type like Wyll" Wyll who is so blindingly good that Astarion has no choice but to be comfotered by it despite his anger for the lack of selfishness. Wyll WHO IN THE GAME WANTS TO DEVELOPE A DEEP ROMANCE CONNECTION BEFORE HE LETS HIMSELF SLEEP WITH YOU?

come on!!! tell me that's not exactly the kind of guy Astarion needs!!!!

I love Bloodweave alot but Bloodfrontier is so slept on.

[arainywriter]

i finally finished a playthrough of bg3, and it was with my bestie!! so here's a memorial post because i'm actually sad to be leaving this campaign behind

meet my tav - Mayumi, a Life Cleric of Kelemvor tiefling; she was the baby of the group, always looking cute and absolutely destroying the undead. She was such a good support class, and yet, she freaking killed so many enemies😭also, she'd constantly play music during tense fight scenes which made my friend laugh

meet my friend's tav - Calan, a Beast Master Ranger half-elf; they met on the nautiloid and became instant friends. He killed so many people with his big ass sword and his bird, and he looked good doing it!

our main party was me, him, Gale, and Astarion. I romanced Gale while my friend romanced Astarion (cause of course), but we switched between the other companions depending on if we were doing their quest

GALE DID NOT LEAVE ME TO BECOME A GOD! i would have actually cried if he did, oh my god😭but he did propose to me😍

and calan and astarion were super cute in the other room while i was being proposed to😏

anyway, we free'd orpheus, had him turn into a mindflayer, and we saved baldur's gate. karlach went with wyll to avernus, laezel is leading the gith rebellion, shadowheart is traveling the world and figuring out her past, gale is a professor, astarion is an adventurer, halsin is a dad, jaheira and minsc are living their lives, and withers is taunting the dead three so it's overall a good life.

bg3 is literally such a good game, guys. i cried multiple times in act 3 because all the companions stories are just good. it's crazy to me that people don't give some of the companions their time. if you're looking for an amazing game, look no further.

anyway, thanks for coming to my memorial post! to you!

[cocomochicakes]

ASKING NON-BG3 FRIEND WHAT THEY THINK ABOUT THE COMPANIONS

So I asked my friend, who has NEVER played BG3, what they think about the characters based on watching my gameplay and clips from TikTok and this is what they said:

ASTARION

Moody brat, except he’s really sweet sometimes? But still a brat. Very hungry and wants to use Tav as a capri sun. He’s also a chaotic goose. Goostarian.

KARLACH

BEST GIRL BEST GIRL BEST GIRL! Heart of gold (and metal…and fire…) She’s a bimbo Barbarian, what’s not to love???? Also her broken horn is so cool. She’s so punk, I just wanna kiss her so bad.

HALSIN

Big horny bear man. I guess the dick is bigger in bear form??? Can Tav even fit that inside them??? Everybody loves Astarian imitating Halsin “enjoying the freedom of nature’s gifts.” Idk, Halsin scares me for some reason…? Maybe it’s the horndog thing. Horn…bear…?

WYLL

Nobody talks about this guy, so I have no idea who he is. Just your average Joe warlock who just wants a cup of coffee, I guess. I think he’s a monster hunter, though? He and Astarian sass each other.

LAE'ZAEL

Frog lady with a tiny nose. She wants to be dominated by Tav. I used to think she was ugly, but I actually think she’s cool looking in her own way. Makes the silly “CHUHK” sound with her tongue. People ship her with Shadowheart…?

SHADOWHEART

EMO EMO EMO!! She comes across as bratty to me. I saw a little bit of her story, and I think it’s cool that she defied her god, but yeah. Sucks to be abandoned by Mommy.

GALE

I heard somebody say once the boy likes to mansplain, so Gale left a sour taste in my mouth after that. Uhhh people say he’s autistic, too? In my friend’s play through, he had electric boots and was standing in ankle-deep water, and then went on to talk about books or something…? Also he’s the guy you meet in the beginning and you can slap his hand. I think that’s funny. His god groomed him, though, so that’s no good. Um…yeah, I think Gale standing in water with electric boots talking about books kinda sums up his character for me.

MINTHARA

I thought she was the Drow with the tainted blood, but she’s not. To recruit her, you gotta kill kids, and is it worth it? Some might say yes. I say that we lose Karlach for it, so no. It’s cool that she thanks you for not killing her. Gotta be some good angst there. I feel like most people just kill the Tieflings without thinking, so she’s probably a second play through kind of character.

☆☆BONUS☆☆

JAHEIRA

My friend said she’s coded Hispanic, so now I just imagine her making tacos and burritos in camp for the crew. (Is that racist…? Is it racist if I think she scolds people by hitting them with her shoe?) Mom of the camp, as told by my friend. Elder milf mommy elf. She can hit me with her shoe and I’d thank her and put it back on for her, and I hate feet.

MINSC

Burly Barbarian-looking dude with…a hamster…? I admire the ability of BG3 to make a barbarian with a hamster named Boo, and also make him attractive enough that people would want to romance him. Can you romance him? I feel like BG3 is just a dating sim with extra steps, so he’s *gotta* be dateable, right? Idk, I’d recruit him. I wanna pet his hamster.

[majorasnightmare]

8, 17, 38?

why is writing dialogue for this guy so FUN

thanks for the enabling 🎉💜

8. Companion/romance death reactions

(if Minthara goes down) "KHAL'ABBIL!! Death cannot take you!"

(if Karlach goes down) "Karlach, NO! Hold on, I will find my way to you!!"

(if Astarion goes down) "Wait for me, Astarion, I will find you an ocean of blood to restore you!"

(if Astarion goes down, has not revealed he's a spawn) "Someone got to Astarion! Hunt them down!"

(if Gale goes down) "SHIT, Gale! Someone get Shadowheart, I'll stabilize the Orb!" [note: if shadowheart is no longer a party member, will call for a cleric in same tone of alarm; stabilizing the orb is appended onto line after gale reveals it]

(if Lae'zel goes down) "The pride of the githyanki goes with you. You MUST rise again!"

(if Shadowheart goes down) "Lady of Loss stay your hand, you will NOT take her from me yet!"

(if Shadowheart goes down, has not revealed sharran yet) "Shadowheart!! Stay with us, cleric! I will carve you a bridge back to the land of the living!!"

(if Wyll goes down) "NO, WYLL!! Linger by me yet awhile longer, until you walk by my side again!!" [note: entreating wylls soul to fight the pull of Avernus so that Dirge can see him revived]

(if Halsin goes down) "Halsin!! I care not if the Oak Father calls you home, you must fight by my side another day yet!!"

(if Jaheira goes down) "Jaheira, stay with me!! Who else will walk Baldur's Gate through her next crisis?"

(if Minsc goes down) "Someone killed Minsc? How?!"

(if Tav goes down) "Walk not down that darkened path, until I am there to escort you! Stay with me!"

(if romanced origin(any) goes down) "No hound of death will steal you away, even if I must travel valleys of corpses and an ocean of gore. Hear my voice and wait for my embrace, beloved!!"

17. Looking in a mirror

"Armageddon's prophet. Looking like he needs a cleanup, too."

"I didn't miss a second stab wound... right?"

"🎶Mmm-🎶 Oh. Wait. Can Caiphon see this? Hrm."

38. If a player character asks them to consider consuming tadpoles or using the Astral tadpoles, how would your Tav/Durge respond?

>"How do you feel about using the tadpoles power?"

"Mm. Can't really say I see the risk in it. I mean, yes, theres ceremorphosis, obviously, but whatever is preventing it now will most likely stop it then too."

"Besides, I feel some manner of... experience, with the gifts it offers. Mayhaps in a former life I called such strengths my own? Regardless, if you're in need of a guinea pig to, ah, "test the waters", if you will, I'm happy to volunteer."

"I'm sure I've eaten worse things, anyways."

>"The Emperor has offered us a great power, in the form of the Astral Tadpole. How do you feel about it?

"Mm. And how magnaminous of it to do so. Sorry, I'm being uncharitable. I suppose I'm just feeling a bit... raw, after it's ruse."

"To the matter at hand. Regardless of its motives for offering it, the Astral Tadpole near hums with psionic strength. Even with it ensconced in your belongings, I can feel it. Such delectable power it offers... The question, of course, is of cost."

"We've already been tadpoled, from where I stand the only real cost to be paid will come calling at the end of this sordid affair. I can't imagine the tadpole, thus strengthed, would hesitate to finish a job half started without the Emperor or the Absolute to stay its hand. But if you trust in the strength of your will, I don't see anything we have reason to fear."

->[player has not used tadpole already]

"Besides, my brain is already a mangled mess. If you wish to play cautious, I'll gladly give it a test run in your stead. I certainly have less to lose than the rest of you."

->[player has already used the astral tadpole]

"Besides, my brain is already a mangled mess. And look at what it's done for you. What kind of warlock would I be to leave power like that on the table, hm? How about this. Pass it to me, and if you start sprouting tentacles before I do, I'll only take a nibble before I put you down properly."

>>"That isn't funny." [-2 Dirge Approval]

"Tch. Go ask a clown for a better joke then. Oh, but you will still share won't you? I'll say sorry, if I must, and if you like I can even try to mean it."

[koieio]

It sort of bothers me just how dirty Larian did Wyll. Western RPGs have a seriously long and bad track record with their black companions, so I was hoping that Wyll would break away from this mold, but nope. The guy character just got chopped up and spit over and over, by both the fans and the company.

Like why doesn't he have an Act 1 romance scene like everyone else, why do we have to wait until Act 2 to get a definite romantic moment with him? Why is it so easy to miss that kissing option in Act 1. Why doesn't he have his own character quest in Act 3, but all the other companions do? Which also means he doesn't have his own Act 3 cutscene for his character quest because he doesn't have one. Ansur is more about the Emperor than Wyll. And the Iron Throne is tied to Gondians, than it is Wyll. And again there is no unique scenes for bringing him.

Why is so much of Wyll's story spent having to share with barely any screen time focused on himself? Even in the Artbook do they have him sharing his page with Mizora? Why? Why is a vast majority of it just the Tav having to make decisions for him, and then when you do make a decision your character going, "OMG, why would Wyll just let his father die like that?" And half your companions disliking you for choosing said option??

Why is this man so buggy? Why does his Act 3 romance scene not trigger for the few people who do romance him?

Why does his romance promise more to come, and give you absolutely nothing until quite possible the near end of Act 3, when all the other companions at least have out of cutscene dialogue furthering your relationship.

Why is his Act 3 romance scene so poorly done? Why is it so short. Why is he suggesting marriage when all we've done is danced at that point? Why is the entire scene shot out of focused, with the two characters rolling around in the grass.

Why did they(very painfully mind you) give this guy a pair of new horns and then do absolutely nothing with that plotline.

Why did they make him this famed folk hero, who even got his own name from saving people and yet no one in game recognizes this man. We see more characters fawning over Karlach, than we do Wyll.

Why does this man have no friends in his home city of Baldurs' Gate?

Why are we allowed to sleep with his abuser and tormentor(Mizora), when no other character are we allowed to do this with. We're can't sleep Cazador behind Astarion's back. We can't sleep Gortash behind Karlach's. So why Mizora?

Why does Mizora have an intimacy cutscene, but not Wyll? How'd they find the time to animate her wrapping her greasy wings around us overlayed over a gradient, but have no time to give Wyll an Act 1 romantic scene? Or fix his Act 3 romance clipping issues before launch. Or spare a moment for Wyll to tell his dad that we're getting married. Or tell him that his son is dead.

Why was my man done so dirty?